What to say when.....
I was thinking today in how many things we as family of wounded, injured and sick loved ones have to endure. I remember when my husband was sent home a year ago how difficult it was to have him accept his situation. He was so discouraged and angry at the same time that I did not know what to say to make it right. It seems that when tragedy strikes there are no words that can make the situation right but I found those phrases of encouragement that changed ALL to the better.
You do not need higher education degree to say the following phrases:
"I will never know how you feel but I will walk beside you and be there for you"
"I will support you and will not leave you alone we will walk together this new path"
"If you let me I will be more than your ______(wife, husband etc.) I will be your best friend"
"Do not fear, be courageous and lets do it together"
"I Love you"
These are simple but powerful phrases that can transformed a life and can transform emotions from a "deafeated state" to a "warrior state". I encourage all caregivers and those who have family members and friends with any type of condition to support them. I know it is difficult because we as caregivers have our own grief, frustration and sadness but we have more tools to cope than those who have lost so much in their life. It has been difficult for me too but I have not and will not give up.
Now I contemplate and all I see is how far my husband has come in only a little over a year, how he took control of his situation. I am so proud of all his accomplishments, he has made much more than I expected because he advocates not for himself but for others. He has been able to build beautiful relationships and have people that encourage him at the same time, he gives himself selfessly for others.
I feel time and effort paid off, it was ALL worth doing. Despite so many different things that happened in our lives in the past year I see the positive of all:
1. We have met incredible, courageous and loving people.
2. We realized how many true friends we have and how much love they have for us.
3. We certainly were tested and our love prevailed.
4. You are now part of our lives because if it is not for our circumstances this blog would not exist.
Please share phrases that you were told that empowered you or that you found useful in the healing process of your loved one. Sharing is the best way for all of us to succeed.
Remember, like I always say love and care but also take care of yourself.